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Relationships

When two people go out together because they are or want to be in a romantic relationship, this is often called dating. For many, dating is about finding someone you can be happy with. Keeping them... more
When two people go out together because they are or want to be in a romantic relationship, this is often called dating. For many, dating is about finding someone you can be happy with. Keeping them and yourself happy is key to a successful relationship.
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Questions and Answers

My past is holding me back from my future. How can I get my life back?

Amy Standifer
Amy Standifer
Christian Sex Therapist and Certified Clinical Trauma Professional

I'm so sorry you had that horrible experience! It's common for those who've experienced childhood trauma(s) to not disclose the events until later in life. Sometimes it doesn't feel safe enough to share the information until the person who hurt them is far away, or even dead. Trusting and... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

Is being mean and fighting with my boyfriend normal after an abortion?

Sherry Katz, LCSW
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Couples and Family Therapist, LCSW

It isn't.Being mean and fighting suggest the naturally strong emotions associated with the decision to end a pregnancy.Even the most detailed thought out decision to end a pregnancy, has mixed emotions along with it.Look within for any emotions which are similar to losing someone with whom you feel... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

Should I end it?

Susan Resnik, M.Ed, LMHC
Susan Resnik, M.Ed, LMHC
Oxford Counseling Services

This is a very personal decision that you make when you have evaluated the issues in your couple that you feel are affecting your happiness and well being in your couple. I recommend completing a compatability checklist to evaluate which areas are making you unhappy. It is important to discuss these... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

How can I tell if my spouse had sex with a prostitute?

Amanda Watkins
Amanda Watkins
Seeking employment with a non-profit agency

I've been in this situation before and have some insight to share with you. In my experience, he was lying and trying to cover it up. By pushing you to std testing, he's distracting you so he can shift the guilt he feels and blame it on you. In a guilty man's mind I believe he's thinking-...if I... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

What can I do about my boyfriend being so close with another girl?

Sherry Katz, LCSW
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Couples and Family Therapist, LCSW

Well, as hurtful as witnessing your boyfriend's closeness with his female friend, I"m glad you saw firsthand the dynamic of your concern.There isn't anything you can directly do to stop his relationship with this lady.It is possible to influence his side of their relationship.Directly telling him... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

What can I do when my boyfriend says he's not ready for marriage?

Sherry Katz, LCSW
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Couples and Family Therapist, LCSW

If you are ready for marriage and he isn't, then ask him his reasons and what his terms would be for making the decision to marry.This way you'll know if he ever would like to be married and if the terms he states are similar enough to yours that this relationship is worth continuing.Also, marriage... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

How can I learn to be content and at peace?

Mirella Caro-Cortes
Mirella Caro-Cortes
Helping Families & Marriages Repair, Recover & Thrive

Hello. What you are experiencing is entirely reasonable for someone that is still trying to adjust to a new life and also leave behind a long term relationship. It sounds like you lost touch with who you were as a person and need to start exploring that side of you again. Spend time doing things... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide.   If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Michael Samar
Michael Samar
Integrative Psychotherapist and Mindfulness Coach

Moving on from a long term relationship can be difficult. Sometimes we can lose a sense of who we are because in a way we have become defined by the relationship itself. So, when we begin to move on and see other people, our sense of identity may be obscured. The tendency is to seek out... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

I'm soon to be married, and I've been messing around with others

Sherry Katz, LCSW
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Couples and Family Therapist, LCSW

Good for you to bring up this situation for addressing, especially before you and your partner are married and have all the legal responsibilities of married life.You gave yourself the biggest clue as to where to start solving this problem.Since you don't know what to do, then for right now... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

Why does my spouse tell me he doesn't want me, but also gets jealous of me?

Sherry Katz, LCSW
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Couples and Family Therapist, LCSW

What a burden for you!Your husband cannot seem to make up his mind on his viewpoint and doesn't seem to care whether or not you're affected by speaking out of two sides of his mouth.Keep yourself protected emotionally from him. There's no good which can come by arguing with a person who flips... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

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