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Relationships

When two people go out together because they are or want to be in a romantic relationship, this is often called dating. For many, dating is about finding someone you can be happy with. Keeping them... more
When two people go out together because they are or want to be in a romantic relationship, this is often called dating. For many, dating is about finding someone you can be happy with. Keeping them and yourself happy is key to a successful relationship.
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Questions and Answers

Lynda Martens
Lynda Martens
Marriage & Family Therapist, MSc, RP, RMFT

Hi Greenville, I respect that you're owning your own overreactions, and that you want to give your boyfriend the respect he deserves. The truth is that some people cheat, and some don't, and our partners deserve the benefit of the doubt unless they show signs they can't be trusted.The answer here is... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Kaileen McMickle, MS, LPC
Kaileen McMickle, MS, LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor

That must feel heartbreaking to you. Where do you think that anxiety comes from? I would try some self-reflecting to see what comes up there. Maybe you are worried about losing your best friend, or something completely different. It's understandable that you would have a lot of feelings in this... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide.   If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Couples and Family Therapist, LCSW

What changed that after six years you raise the question of what to do about this relationship?Had you hoped until now that she would leave?If this is so, and she clearly told you she will continue in her marriage, then the control is in your hands now as to how long you are willing to continue in... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Olivia Farr, MS, LAC, NCC
Olivia Farr, MS, LAC, NCC
No judgment, just a safe space.

Dependency doesn't necessarily need to be a negative, as there is a moderate amount that comes with a healthy relationship. I.E., depending on your boyfriend to be emotionally there for you when you have a bad day is a sign of healthy relationship between you. It sounds like your dependency on your... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide.   If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Natalie Moore | Holistic Therapy
Natalie Moore | Holistic Therapy
🛋 For creative, ambitious millennials

It sounds to me like you would benefit from mindfulness practice and self-compassion practice. What is mindfulness?Mindfulness, in short, is the practice of bringing a non-judgmental awareness to the present moment. This meditative tradition stems from Buddhism and was brought to the West by Zen... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Viviana  Diaz
Viviana Diaz
Licensed Professional Counselor

Endings in relationship are difficult, and my heart goes out to you. It is difficult to start again, but not impossible. After a break up we may loss our identify and grieve what could have been, and some other aspects that are brought up to the surface. You recognize that you have become needy and... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room. I would definitely encouraged you to start a conversation with her around your concerns from a place of love and care without judgment. Try to listen her perspective, and if she also is aware of the impact in her mood. If she is concerned about what is going on in her life, then you can offer and specialist to support her in the process. If not, continue checking in with her. You did not mention her age, but if she is a minor (Under 18 years old) you can also bring it up with general doctor to have an anxiety/depression assessment that can lead to more specific data about her difficulties and referred to a specialist.
Rafael Morales
Rafael Morales
24/7 Integral Support Online

Previous counselors have discussed very good points about your situation so I would like just to confirm what seems essential to me on this topic. When you ask yourself this question, it shows you are not happy or have doubts about the way things have evolved so far. Relationships require time and... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Couples and Family Therapist, LCSW

Sounds scary to watch. I agree with you!Maybe he felt so overwhelmed by anger, hurt and frustration that he went back to an old behavior from his past in which someone hit him for having strong emotions.Now that the incident is past, bring up the topic to him so the two of you can discuss it.Just... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Amanda Watkins
Amanda Watkins
Seeking employment with a non-profit agency

I've been in this situation before and have some insight to share with you. In my experience, he was lying and trying to cover it up. By pushing you to std testing, he's distracting you so he can shift the guilt he feels and blame it on you. In a guilty man's mind I believe he's thinking-...if I... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Amy Higgs OTR/L, CLT, CAPS
Amy Higgs OTR/L, CLT, CAPS
Mobile Occupational Therapist: sensory bus for children with ASD, SPD, ADD/ADHD and trauma

The answer lies in what the outcome will be. How will things end if you find out he had sex with a prostitute? Will you leave? Will you try to work things out? The multiple versions are concerning. He seems unable to be truthful and this is damaging your relationship. Before considering marital... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.