Relationships

I am sorry to learn of this. You must be extremely frustrated and heartbroken. To begin, he is correct. You have done nothing wrong. This is entirely a coping mechanism in overdrive. It is fear. It is anger. It is extreme sadness. It is feelings of abandonment. It is intense emotional pain... more

That's a loaded question. Typically, if we are contemplating if we should or not, it is for a reason. To really come to a place of decision, you need to know where you are right now, what is not working, what the potential resolution would be and if it is realistic. If you can answer those... more

You might ask your fiance about people who have let him down in the past; past hurts from parents, friends, people he has dated. If you are speaking about jealousy he may come from a divorced parent upbringing, may have seen parents cheat on one or the other, may have had partners cheat on him in... more

No one can tell you how to deal with your own relationship, even a therapist. But, you should absolutely give your girlfriend the respect of believing both of those statements she gives you: development of feelings and it being a "crush." If that makes you feel a certain way (mistrustful? no... more

I can only imagine how hard that must have been to hear. On one hand, most of us would say we want our partners to always be honest with us, but on the other disclosures like this can lead to feelings of worry and inadequacy if we're not careful. So let me first of all say that it is very normal for... more

The answer lies in what the outcome will be. How will things end if you find out he had sex with a prostitute? Will you leave? Will you try to work things out? The multiple versions are concerning. He seems unable to be truthful and this is damaging your relationship. Before considering marital... more

Assuming there are no medical explanations for this issue, many men I've worked with on this come to see it as essentially a form of Anxiety. There is a phenomenon called the Yerkes Dodson Law (see below; source: Wikipedia), which basically states that if we feel either too much or too little stress... more

Thanks for your question. Becoming a good listener is an essential piece in being a better communicator. Being an effective communicator will almost always improve the quality of your relationships. What stands in your way of listening to her? Do you find yourself becoming defensive when she brings... more

Hi Bend, You're scared, right? That makes sense. Each time we have a break-up we are a bit more in touch with how much is at stake in this whole love and relationship business. We are falling in love and letting someone close to our hearts and there's a vulnerability in that; we can get hurt. Who... more

Your question highlights your pain very clearly. What you are describing is one of the most common scenarios I see in my practice with couples: One partner feels terribly lonely and unimportant in response to the other partner either turning towards other people and activities or being withdrawn... more