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Relationships

When two people go out together because they are or want to be in a romantic relationship, this is often called dating. For many, dating is about finding someone you can be happy with. Keeping them... more
When two people go out together because they are or want to be in a romantic relationship, this is often called dating. For many, dating is about finding someone you can be happy with. Keeping them and yourself happy is key to a successful relationship.
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Questions and Answers

Should I end it?

Rafael Morales
Rafael Morales
24/7 Integral Support Online

Previous counselors have discussed very good points about your situation so I would like just to confirm what seems essential to me on this topic. When you ask yourself this question, it shows you are not happy or have doubts about the way things have evolved so far. Relationships require time and... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Siena Blanco, MS LCPC
Siena Blanco, MS LCPC
Be transformed by the renewing of your mind...
That you are questioning if you should end your relationship with your boyfriend tells me that you are unhappy with him. Spend sometime by yourself exploring the reasons for that unhappiness. Are these things likely to change or not? 
The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

Why did my boyfriend hit himself in the face during an argument?

Sherry Katz, LCSW
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Couples and Family Therapist, LCSW

Sounds scary to watch. I agree with you!Maybe he felt so overwhelmed by anger, hurt and frustration that he went back to an old behavior from his past in which someone hit him for having strong emotions.Now that the incident is past, bring up the topic to him so the two of you can discuss it.Just... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

How can I tell if my spouse had sex with a prostitute?

Amanda Watkins
Amanda Watkins
Seeking employment with a non-profit agency

I've been in this situation before and have some insight to share with you. In my experience, he was lying and trying to cover it up. By pushing you to std testing, he's distracting you so he can shift the guilt he feels and blame it on you. In a guilty man's mind I believe he's thinking-...if I... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Amy Higgs OTR/L, CLT, CAPS
Amy Higgs OTR/L, CLT, CAPS
Mobile Occupational Therapist: sensory bus for children with ASD, SPD, ADD/ADHD and trauma

The answer lies in what the outcome will be. How will things end if you find out he had sex with a prostitute? Will you leave? Will you try to work things out? The multiple versions are concerning. He seems unable to be truthful and this is damaging your relationship. Before considering marital... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

How do I cope with separation anxiety while boyfriend is out of town?

Nicole Stone
Nicole Stone
Anxiety, relationship crisis, and the separation/divorce experience.

Relationships at any amount of distance can be so hard! It makes sense that you are encountering more anxiety than usual given that major change in your relationship. And you're right that being separated from our partners can heighten our insecurities and worries about not only our relationship... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

How can I be less dependent on my boyfriend?

Olivia Farr, MS, LAC, NCC
Olivia Farr, MS, LAC, NCC
No judgment, just a safe space.

Dependency doesn't necessarily need to be a negative, as there is a moderate amount that comes with a healthy relationship. I.E., depending on your boyfriend to be emotionally there for you when you have a bad day is a sign of healthy relationship between you. It sounds like your dependency on your... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide.   If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

How can I get my husband to listen to my needs and talk to me?

Olivia Farr, MS, LAC, NCC
Olivia Farr, MS, LAC, NCC
No judgment, just a safe space.

It can become painful when we feel unheard and invalidated. Especially if this becomes a pattern in our communication, we begin to build walls and boundary ourselves more rigidly, letting very little of our authentic selves out. As many others have said, your husband may feel defensive at the fact... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide.   If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

How do I pick between two guys?

Sherry Katz, LCSW
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Couples and Family Therapist, LCSW

Decide your purpose in being part of a relationship.Fastbeating heartbeat sounds exciting, and usually goes gradually away.If you'd like excitement, then the heartbeat guy is for you.If you're trying to find a partner who will be with you for a long time then the first guy fits this agenda.You could... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

My past is holding me back from my future. How can I get my life back?

Meira Alon
Meira Alon
Child, Trauma & Veteran Therapist

You are so brave to come out and talk about your trauma! I hope it started helping you with your healing process. I think you have good instinct, often past especially past trauma can hold us back in areas we aren't even aware of since you have spent so much time trying to compensate and feel ok. It... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

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