Intimacy

What you are experiencing is common with survivors of abusive relationships. Even abusive relationships have positive moments in them and typically for survivors those are things they still love and care about of the abuser. A lot of it could also be grief over the loss of the relationship and also... more

I’m glad that you are reaching out for help. What you are going though sounds overwhelming and exhausting. Here is a link that talks about the signs of an abuse relationship if you are questioning whether or not you are experiencing an abusive relationship https://www.helpguide.org/articles/abuse... more

First off, don't blame yourself or be too quick to jump to any scary conclusions. Human sexuality can be incredibly complex at times (e.g., what turns us on at one time may not be what turns us on the next time). There could actually be a number of things going on including him having performance... more

Your question is a good one!The best way to decrease the fear would be to talk with your fiancee about it. Eventually she'll find out, and better to talk about it when there is less pressure than to be in the midst of a situation which frightens you.Also, she may feel similar to you, who knows... more

Well, there is some good news and not-so-good news. The good news is that people are capable of moving on from relationships, even if the person showed them a sort of love that they've never felt they've had, or deserved, before. Sometimes, even just the fact that this has happened for them can... more

What if we think about this in metaphor: imagine a dirt road suddenly paved over - where before it was small, once paved, it was faster, smoother and suddenly you, the driver, knew what real driving could feel like. Then your road got a pothole: now, every time you drive, you hit that hole, and it... more

There is no wrong or right way to define a relationship. I believe each relationship we are in is an opportunity to expand and to know self on a deeper level. We are conditioned to believe that we are not valued, or worth much without the confirmation of others and the world around us. Give yourself... more

As you say, if he does reply it is hurtful. But, if he doesn't reply, it sounds like it's just as hurtful (though more in my opinion in terms of the longer-range effects on the relationship). The behavior he is exhibiting would easily pass for "passive-aggression," as it is manipulative and... more

Your boyfriend and you have a separate relationship than your relationship with your mother. By trying to control whether or not you visit your mom, unless you are in agreement with this, is building tension between you and him.Ask why he resents your interest to see your mother.If he is insecure... more

Were you happy with the ways she satisfied you?A relationship is happiest if each partner concentrates on the happiness of the other.Strange for someone who was treated badly to describe themselves as bored, rather than say they feel hurt.Is it possible you are being self-critical about your... more