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Family Conflict

No matter how loving a family is, all families go through conflict. Family conflict is different from other types of conflict for several reasons. First, family members are already highly emotionally... more
No matter how loving a family is, all families go through conflict. Family conflict is different from other types of conflict for several reasons. First, family members are already highly emotionally attached. These emotions can quickly intensify conflict. Second, family members are involved in long-term relationships and often are required to interact with each other daily. Finally, families are often insular, obeying their own rules and resisting outside interference. These characteristics can lead to long, tangled, painful conflicts. At one extreme, family conflict can lead to things like divorce or domestic violence. At the other, families try to repress conflict, avoiding problems and detaching from each other (CRInfo.org).
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Questions and Answers

How can I avoid family members who stress me out?

Sherry Katz, LCSW
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Couples and Family Therapist, LCSW

Then one day when life between you and mom feels calm, tell your mom that you aren't able to listen to her complaints about your sister.The truth exists whether or not it is acknowledged. Bu acknowledging what feels real and necessary in your life, you are helping your mom see what she may not... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Virginia Chow
Virginia Chow
Theraspace

It is understandable that it's very hard for you to hear daily complaints from your mother regarding the caregiving of your niece. You cannot change your mother's feelings and responsibilities, which could create feelings of frustration and helplessness. It must be equally hard for your mother to... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Gwendolyn Nelson-Terry
Gwendolyn Nelson-Terry
www.GwendolynNelsonTerry.com

Sounds like it is time to set some boundaries with your mom. You can do this by letting her know that you understand how she is feeling and you understand that she is under a tremendous amount of stress. Validate her feelings and words. After you do that, tell her how hearing about it daily is... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

No matter what I do, my mom will almost always find something wrong with it

Melissa Burton
Melissa Burton
Counseling for Life Transitions

Let me first say that I am sorry you are going through this. Yes, this is a symptom of an ugly disease, but that does not make experiencing it any easier. If your mother was a sweet and understanding lady, I am sure this change in personality feels awful! On the other hand, if your relationship with... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide.   If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

Why did my sister not defend me when my ex-husband said bad things about me?

Sherry Katz, LCSW
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Couples and Family Therapist, LCSW

Sorry for so much emotional pain from the combination of the divorce and your sister not supporting you in the way you wish.When you feel ready and if you feel this would help, then consider to talk to your sister from perspective to improve the relationship the two of you have.Since the ex is gone... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

How do I find a therapist for my family as a minor?

Vivian D. Echevarria Guzman, MSC, LPC-S, NCC
Vivian D. Echevarria Guzman, MSC, LPC-S, NCC
Bilingual Licensed Professional Counselor

This is a question that I often get from patients. Can I get my family into therapy? How can I get someone else to do something that I think is best for them? The answer is you can suggest, but you can’t force them. I spend a lot of time teaching my patients the importance of recognizing the... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room. La información provista es para propósito general basado en información mínima, no constituye aviso medico. Esta información tampoco constituye una comunicación directa con un consejero o terapista y no crea una relación entre cliente y terapeuta o desarrolla ningún privilegio. Si tiene pensamientos suicidas o está en crisis puede llamar al 911 o visitar su sala de emergencias mas cercana.

How do I cope with "never being good enough?"

Amelia Mora Mars
Amelia Mora Mars
Hi, I'm Amelia. I help overwhelmed, stressed out teen girls and women find peace again.

Hi, I'm Amelia! Oh, this is a common problem, unfortunately! Let me say first of all, that doing more, giving more, loving more, performing more will never provide you with a sense of worth. Nor will it satisfy those that are critical and judgmental. I am so sorry to hear that this is what you've... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

I get verbally abused everyday by my parents in front of my child and I cannot take it anymore

Amelia Mora Mars
Amelia Mora Mars
Hi, I'm Amelia. I help overwhelmed, stressed out teen girls and women find peace again.

Hello, I am sorry to hear about you feeling verbally abused, trapped without an escape, and emotionally drained. Sounds to me like you are being treated more like a child than an adult. It's time to learn about healthy boundaries and being treated like an adult. This process will take time, but... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

Why do I feel like I'm nothing more than a wife and mom?

Dr. John Frampton
Dr. John Frampton

Being a parent can be all-consuming. And there are more societal pressures on mothers to be everything to their children and families. In that effort to be everything (cook, housekeeper, planner, social organizer, teacher, etc) it can be easy to forget about being you. We can certainly... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide.   If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

My boyfriend's family expects him to take them on dates, and he doesn't think anything's wrong

Sherry Katz, LCSW
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Couples and Family Therapist, LCSW

Well, then you learned something new about your boyfriend!Are you fine with having a different opinion than him and staying together.Think over how major a problem this is to you and if it is reason enough to leave the relationship.There are always plenty of areas of disagreement between partners in... more

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

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