Pamela Suraci

I imagine you are trying to figure out a way to be "fair" to your adult kids. The key word is "adult". If your daughter can afford to join the family for a vacation that's great, she's welcome to come. However, as you pointed out she took a vacation by herself last year - she chose to put her... more

If I understand you correctly, this "maybe-boyfriend" has done a partial break up, and wants to maintain a partial relationship. Is that ok with you? And, if it is, what does it cost you? He says he's "done" but still wants the connection. That seems to leave him free to explore other options... more

It sounds like you've been living with this uncertainty for those couple years since this happened. The reality is you won't ever "know" - mostly because of the various versions your husband has provided you. Infidelity, though painful, does not have to kill a marriage. Secrecy and dishonesty... more

There is some great advice here that can really help, but you need some direct support. Please find a caregiver support organization, a grief group and an individual therapist to help you during this trying time. Your mom may not know what she is saying, or mean the awful things she says, but that... more

You are in the midst of a really hard time and it sounds like you have no help at all. Search out a local support group through community counseling type centers. If you can't find a group, at least get in to see a therapist who can help you manage stress and upset better. Your sadness... more

The obvious answer is no, it's not okay. There are other you should be asking though. You said your fiance "seems afraid" of her ex. Did you ask her about that? Is there a reason he still has a key to the home? Has there been any discussion of appropriate boundaries? I work with a lot of... more

Ugh! We spend so many hours at work, so if it's a tough environment it can really drag you down. Is this your "dream job" gone sour or a "just pay the bills" deal that has gotten stale? It makes a big difference in terms of next steps.For example, if this job is a step on the way to a bigger goal... more

If you haven't already, please see a doctor. ED can be caused by any number of physical conditions and you need to get checked out. Once you have ruled out any physical issues that interfere with getting an erection, it's time to look for more subtle causes. Unfortunately, you may have gotten... more

First, congratulations on your new job. Apparently your employers think highly of you, since they hired you!You say that "people keep telling" you that you have "anxiety" - how do they know? Have you told others you are sometimes upset or nervous? Have you been treated for anxiety? Or is that a... more

Losing someone you love, someone who has been there from your very first days, is really hard. Look for a local hospice support organization in your community - grief groups and counseling are often available through these centers. Don't just tough it out and wait for your sadness to fade. Your... more

You felt bad when you lied, so you told the truth. I imagine your mom was really shocked and upset - both of those things tell me you are a pretty honest person. It's possible that your mom had a big reaction simply because she has learned that her child, from whom she always assumed honesty, was... more

Well, yes, of course it scares them. They see someone they love behaving is frightening ways. That's a good reason to want to manage your emotions differently...but what are your thoughts on your anger? Do you think your angry feelings justify lashing out? The thing is that feeling angry is... more

Both you and your mom are in a tough spot. She has returned to parenting after she thought she had raised her kids, and while I am sure you'd like to be supportive, you recognize that listening to her complaints really does not help her and drains you. In addition to that, it sounds like Mom's... more

That sounds awful, and is clearly unsustainable. There are some great answers that give some guidance about what might be an underlying condition. If all physical and mental health issues are ruled out, it's time to take action. Get backup from friends or family members if you need to, but let... more

Yes it is absolutely normal! A good therapist can help your feel safe enough to really identify painful wounds. There are some things that need to be cried about before they can heal. Therapists are fine with tears and buy tissues by the case. That said, if you don't cry during therapy it doesn... more