I feel really uncomfortable around other people
When I'm in large crowds I get angry and I just can't deal with people. I don't really like other people (I prefer animals) they make me nervous and scared.
I lay awake at night thinking and having conversations in my head and i almost always end up making myself feel terrible and crying, I have more conversions in my head than I do with actual people.
I don't know what's wrong with me and why I feel this way. What should I do?
I think nothing is wrong with you. You woke up human today - not a robot. And its natural, albeit challenging to struggle. In fact, If we all walked around with subtittles and could see each others thoughts, I think you would find so very many people with such similar thoughts, insecurities, and fears as your own.
Sharing how you feel with a trusted other can begin to break the trance that we can fall into - that "I'm different from others". "Somethings wrong with me", or "I should be different."
Another thing I like to remember is that becoming at ease in oneself is a skill, and one can become more at ease in being in many situations and around many different people with practice. The key really is - developing more understanding for oneself and detaching from some of the lies of the chatter in your mind that tell you you are somehow 'terminally unique' or unworthy/deficient in some way.
Easier said than done, right? Yup, I know. If we lived in a culture that did not condition us to defeat ourselves with this kind of inner negative, desparaging self talk, it would be quite a bit easier.
But that's what help is for. A skillful therapist can absolutely help you make progress in becoming more at ease , less stressed nside yourself. And as you gain confidence with the skills involved in this, YOU WILL become more and more at ease around others, or atleast less undermined by others opinions of you.
And as an added bonus, you will find yourself putting more and more gravity inside yourself rather than in the power of outside opinions.
First step I suggest? Begin with giving yourself credit for naming what you want and taking the risk of asking your question here!
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