My fiancé's ex-husband shows up unannounced
he just walks in the house whenever he wants to see his kids. My fiancé tells me it makes her angry and doesn't like it, but she seems afraid to say anything to him about it for some reason. Is it okay for him to do this?
The short answer to your question is "No" it's not okay for anyone to ever be doing this. There's a lot of unanswered questions and other factors going on here that need attention. Nevertheless, don't hesitate to seek out legal counsel and/or call 911.
Ideally, your fiancé would be able to speak directly to her ex-husband and set reasonable boundaries that honor whatever legal agreements are in force resultant from the divorce and custody agreements. The fact that she's afraid to say anything to him about his inappropriate behavior, and that she hasn't been able to give you any reason for her fear, suggests possible factors of past abusive behaviors, entitlement, and/or co-dependence.
I hope things work out well for all and I'm confident a skilled therapist could help all navigate how best to set boundaries and experience greater healing.
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