I was duped into getting married to a therapist, but once her immigration status was secure, she bolted

How do I ever trust another woman? I have found myself constantly reading between the lines with every other woman that I meet. I am having a difficult time making any sort of connection to anyone because of her deception and willingness to say and do literally anything in order to control my emotions.

Once the "relationship" was over, she became extremely abusive and has attempted to intimidate me into silence regarding the many false claims made on her immigration application.

Sherry Katz, LCSW
Sherry Katz, LCSW
Couples and Family Therapist, LCSW

I'm sorry to hear about being taken advantage of by your former wife.

On the positive side, think of how much you learned by going through this very painful time.

Maybe you are naturally very generous and caring, to the point of expecting very little from the other person, for example.

Consider yourself in a favorable position to not feel like going out right now and meeting a new person.   

Your spirit is guiding you to stay put and recuperate from this ordeal, review for any signs you may have been more trusting than merited by the person's behavior.

There's a natural flow to what we're able to handle and when we have renewed capacity for new adventures.

There's no reason to assume that you'll never trust another woman again.  

The first step is re-building trust in yourself to step into a new relationship.   There is no designated time line.  You'll simply feel more ready than you feel now.

Very unlikely that you'd ever place yourself in a similar situation to the one you're currently recovering from.

Good luck!

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist nor does it create a therapist-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.
Eric Ström, JD, MA, LMHC
Eric Ström, JD, MA, LMHC
Attorney & Licensed Mental Health Counselor

I'm sorry to hear about that situation. If the woman was your therapist (or had been at one time), this could represent a significant ethical violation when she created a dual relationship with you.

Even if you were not her client, this might still be an ethical violation. Counselors are held to a high standard of conduct and honesty at all times.

In a situation like this you might consider filing a complaint with the state regulatory board.

The information above is intended as general information...  (more)The information above is intended as general information based on minimal information, and does not constitute health care nor legal advice. This information does not constitute communication with a counselor/therapist/attorney nor does it create a therapist-client nor attorney-client relationship nor any of the privileges that relationship may provide. If you are currently feeling suicidal or are in crisis, call 911 or proceed to your local emergency room.

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