Can I change my feeling of being worthless to everyone?
I'm going through some things with my feelings and myself. I barely sleep and I do nothing but think about how I'm worthless and ow I shouldn't be here.
I've never tried or contemplated suicide. I've always wanted to fix my issues, but I never get around to it.
How can I change my feeling of being worthless to everyone?
I am sorry you are feeling this way. We all have narratives that we say to ourselves whether it is valid or not. In your case it would be beneficial to explore when and how this belief began and rewrite your story. There are different ways to explore and rewrite. This process requires commitment, self-reflection and courage.
- 35 views
I first want to let you know that you are not alone in your feelings and there is always someone there to help. You can always change your feelings and change your way of thinking by being open to trying to change. You can always make yourself available to learning new things or volunteering so that you can make a purpose for yourself.
- 250 views
If everyone thinks you're worthless, then maybe you need to find new people to hang out with.
Seriously, the social context in which a person lives is a big influence in self-esteem.
Otherwise, you can go round and round trying to understand why you're not worthless, then go back to the same crowd and be knocked down again.
There are many inspirational messages you can find in social media. Maybe read some of the ones which state that no person is worthless, and that everyone has a good purpose to their life.
Also, since our culture is so saturated with the belief that if someone doesn't feel good about themselves that this is somehow terrible.
Bad feelings are part of living. They are the motivation to remove ourselves from situations and relationships which do us more harm than good.
Bad feelings do feel terrible. Your feeling of worthlessness may be good in the sense of motivating you to find out that you are much better than your feelings today.
- 354 views
Hello, and thank you for your question and seeking advice on this. Feelings of worthlessness is unfortunately common. In fact, most people, if not all, have felt this to some degree at some point in their life. You are not alone.
Changing our feelings is like changing our thoughts - it's hard to do. Our minds are so amazing that the minute you change your thought another one can be right there to take it's place. Without your permission, another thought can just pop in there. The new thought may feel worse than the last one! My guess is that you have tried several things to improve this on your own even before reaching out on here. People often try thinking positive thoughts, debating with their thoughts, or simply telling themselves that they need to "snap out of it" - which is also a thought that carries some self-criticism.
Some people try a different approach, and there are counselors out there that can help you with this. The idea is that instead of trying to change the thoughts, you change how you respond to them. You learn skills that allow you to manage difficult thoughts and feelings differently so they don't have the same impact on you that they do right now. For some people, they actually DO begin to experience less hurtful thoughts once they learn how to manage the ones they have differently. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy may be a good choice for you.
There is information online and even self-help books that you can use to teach you the skills that I mentioned. Because they are skills, they require practice, but many people have found great relief and an enriched life by learning them.
As for suicidal thoughts, I am very glad to read that this has not happened to you. Still, you should watch out for this because it can be a sign of a worsening depression. If you begin to think about this, it is important to reach out to a support system right away. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 1-800-273-8255. The text line is #741741.
I hope some other colleagues will provide you more suggestions.
Robin Landwehr, DBH, LPCC
- 598 views
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